SOME SQUIRRELY THIS AND THAT.

Part I: If it’s already hot water, why are we worried about heating it??

Today has been a weird day. It started off with me waking up and not knowing what day it is. Hubby was up, dressed in some jean shorts and a t-shirt like it was Saturday but it was still dark outside. What was he doing up so early?? But wait, isn’t this… mmmmm…. I laid there truly stumped! I finally got an explanation when he noticed that I was awake: he’d just come down from the attic after determining that the 5-month-old water heater wasn’t working. Something to do with the regulator thingy and the pilot light being out. Thank goodness we got the kind that the gas shuts off if the pilot light goes out! But then if the regulator thingy isn’t working, doesn’t that mean the gas shutter-offer thingy could fail, too?? I’ll be glad when the plumber comes to check it out tomorrow!

After chickening out on taking a cold shower I opted to instead heat up some water in the microwave to use for a spit bath. What a really nasty term – spit bath. I never was one of those moms who spit on her finger or a tissue and wiped off her kid’s face. YUUUUCK! Instead I’d make THEM spit on the finger or tissue and use their own slime to clean off their own grime. Do we think that maybe that’s why they both learned at an early age to keep their faces clean?? Anyway – back on topic - I couldn’t wash my hair, though!! If the plumber doesn’t get me worked in tomorrow I’m going to the beauty shop and have them wash my hair for me and then backcharge the water heater manufacturer for the cost! (Don’t we wish it worked that way! LOL!!)

Part II: DO NOT Scare the Crazy Lady!!

I have an eye lid infection. I found this out when I went to the eye doctor today after not being able to wear my contacts for two days. No, it doesn’t really hurt. It just feels irritating like when there’s something stuck in your eyelashes – like a sideways lash or something.

While waiting at the light to turn into the parking lot at the doc’s office, I was suddenly startled into nearly peeing on myself by this very loud TOOOOT TOOOOOT of the horn of a really large vehicle that I frantically realized was a fire truck pinned into the lane behind me. I looked for a path to get out of its way, but there was nowhere for me to go either. Then I realized that they had no lights on. It was just sitting behind me honking its horn! The cars in front of me ooched up some, so I was able to pull forward a bit and look in the outside rearview mirror that I’d tilted all the way up for a better angle. THEY WERE WAVING AT ME! OK – Now I’m thinking, what’s wrong??? Is my car on fire? Is my gas cap open? I sat there trying to figure it out until the light changed and I was able to turn into the parking lot… and they went on by like nothing had happened! What the…?????

Well, being the efficient (read: anal) person that I am, I whipped out my trusty cell phone and dialed the already programmed number to the fire station office. When the secretary/dispatcher answered, I told her where I was and that she needed to tell those goofballs not to alarm people by honking at stoplights! She asked if I could think of any reason why they’d be honking at me… Then it dawned on me! I think they were the guys who’d tried to get Hunker D. out of my car. The dispatcher cracked up when I told her that. She said I they’d probably recognized the car and were just being friendly. I told her to tell them that it’s not nice to scare crazy old ladies that early in the morning!

Next time I catch a squirrel I think maybe it’ll get to go on a romp in their bunk house. Let’s see who gets startled then!

Amazingly, there is actually a third part to this wacky day's tale, but this story is already too long as it is, so I’ll save the rest for tomorrow and close for now…

Wishing you peace, blessings, lots of hot water and no big toots.