As promised ...
In the week before the oblivion we spent a lot of time going to appointments with her doctor, counselor, probation officer. We also picked up applications at every place we thought might be willing to hire a 16 YO. The end result of it all is that:
1. The PO agreed not to put her back in lockup as long as she is working, attending GED classes, and following all her court orders.
2. SHE GOT A JOB! YAY! I am now the proud parent of a Kroger bagger/basket pusher.
At home she alternates between her traumatic ages (3, 8, & 10) and being a normal snot-nosed bratty teenager determined to move out on her own as soon as she can get enough money together to pay for her own place. I handle the latter much better than the former.
It is getting harder and harder for me to deal with her regressions because I know that if she doesn't decide to get a handle on them soon they will interfere with her job and probation status. Nobody in the outside world is going to put up with a kid her age throwing an 8 YO tantrum when she doesn't get her way.
Did you ever hear about the time when the speaker at a preachers' conference asked folks to stand and tell everyone their favorite bible verse? Well, this old, rugged, gray-haired preacher stood and said, "I've lived a long life. Been at the pulpit for more than 50 years. In all that time I've learned a thing or two, and through all I've experienced I've held onto one phrase that is repeated over and over: It came to pass." All the other younger, smarter, better educated preachers just stared at him. Finally, the speaker broke the silence when he asked why on earth he'd chosen that particular phrase to hang onto. The wise old preacher replied, "In times of trial it keeps me strong because I know the good book said that it came to pass, not that it came to stay."
That's kind of where I am right now. Hanging onto the fact that it came to pass. That God has a plan for her and for me, and He's not going to let it stay this hard forever.
I leave you with a few of my favorites of late:
Joshua 21:45: Not one of the good promises which the LORD had made to the house of Israel failed; all came to pass.
Psalm 105:19: Until the time that his word came to pass, The word of the LORD tested him.
Adolescence is perhaps nature's way of preparing parents to welcome the empty nest. ~Karen Savage and Patricia Adams, The Good Stepmother